moving back to the "old world"

there is a certain amount of guilt attached to moving "back" to Europe. not guilt that i feel, but guilt which is inflicted. why move back when my ancestors went to the "new world" for a better life....but I'm largely over the guilt. it's just that my sister is coming over now and so the guilt is on again...the attraction (during the Bush administration), isn't really my fault...i can't help it that where i live is more attractive....there are more opportunities, better salaries, better jobs. such is life in europe at the moment.

lights out, slow skate

hit a radio station on the way home that was playing disco. it transported me instantly back to the community building on a saturday night, clad in well-worn whitish-grey skates with red laces. last song(s) of the evening, lights dimmed, holding hands in a furtive sort of way with some local farm boy....was it troy rommen (romeo & juliet, samson & deliliah...when we kissed, oooo, fire)...or was that later, at that junior high dance, after which i came down with a late (7th grade) case of chicken pox....doesn't really matter. amazing how both music and scents can transport you into a memory, especially of a place. it happened yesterday too, when i wore kenneth cole's black perfume. hadn't worn it in a few months. it transported me, several times during the day, to my first (and only) trip to korea--to that crazy o'kim's irish bar in the lobby of the westin. but that doesn't really have anything to do with lights out, slow skate, now does it?

to do

* pack for Manila
* laundry
* move files over from ftp
* charge iPod(s)
* answer all outstanding emails
* write novel
* lose 20 kilos
* adjust budgets
* prepare cLear presentation
* pack prezzies for airplane
* find more time to think

construction zone

building on....bites. if we could just fast forward to the bit where the new room is there and i'm setting the table for a nice dinner with friends in there, cooking it on the new stove and taking chilled south african sauvignon blanc out of the retro red smeg fridge....but alas, that's not the case. instead, we're living out of boxes and wearing shoes inside to avoid all those yucky dusty bits that are on the floor around the place. rooms are torn apart. people have to lie on our bed to watch t.v. we're living out of boxes and suitcases. there's nowhere to relax. i'm crossing my fingers that it'll all be worth it. if i survive....

tired of flying? me?

it's very tired in here. i never ever thought i would say it, but i'm a bit frazzled from all the travel. never before has it occurred to me to be anything but excited going to the airport, no matter which way i'm going--away or home. but i fly to manila on friday and for the first time, it makes me feel tired to think of it. it's even a trip where i look forward to being there. if only i could transport there, ala star trek. maybe it's just because i'll be in monkey and on lufthansa. which, of course, i will survive. and it's for a noble cause--to sit with my 6½-year-old. people survive in monkey class all the time! i see them when they eventually get to the baggage claim. but i hate that stopover in guanzhou. they don't let you off the plane and they open all the doors and refuel the plane. there's something very unappealing about that. i hope this feeling passes. i've always loved flying and being in the airport and i don't want that to go away. it's maybe just been a bit much this year....i'm sure i'll get over it. if only i could get some rest.

long time no....

....blog. in the meantime, it seems that this is another of those sites google has taken over. don't really know if that matters so much. probably actually improves things. here in front of the internet. i don't really spend as much time in front of the internet as i once did. when i had time. now, during my day, i almost don't even have time to stop and go to the bathroom. so it's rather lucky that i don't have time to drink coffee either--not that i would, because it's foul from those machines. but it's good to be busy. however, one should be better at making time for the little things in life. like blogging.