longing

i feel a strange sense of melancholic longing...for a ruin. one of my favorites is stobi, in central macedonia. there is just something about walking among the ancient columns and crumbling walls during the heat of the day, with the hot wind blowing across my face. the wind brings with it a sense of the timelessness...how those rocks and columns have stood and will continue to stand long after i leave.

when i'm in a place like that, where it's quite deserted and one has it to oneself, i feel that if i listen carefully enough, i can hear the whispers of those who lived there. the echo of their footsteps and of their voices. the bustle of the activities of their lives. filling their jars at the communal fountain, praying in the temples, bathing in the baths. all of the flurry of activity that must have been a roman town in the first and second centuries. i feel all of that whispering there in the timeless winds and the relentless sun.

i feel the same about ruins in turkey...troy, pergamon, alexander troas, the athena temple perched high on a hillside overlooking the aegean, ephesus...i hear the whispers of those who were there and can very nearly feel their robes brush against me as they make their way past, i hear the roar of the crowd in the amphitheatre, i feel the wisdom of sophia gazing down on me. i long for that feeling right now...to feel connected to the past and a part of something larger and more enduring....