creativity happening

i know. i'm obsessed with whether or not i'm creating something at the moment. but it's because it's of concern to me. after three very dry years of not creating anything crafty (i created plenty of work stuff), i am feeling a deep and abiding need to create something--painting, writing, knitting, felting, even cooking, whatever it is...so forgive me if i'm obsessed.

at last, i feel i have acquired enough of the necessary supplies...pretty papers (i know, i'm obsessed with those as well), embellishments (including, but not limited to ribbons, brads, little eyelet thingies, felt, flowers, rub-ons, alphabets and stickers), stamping supplies, paints, canvases, brushes, gesso (that's cool stuff!!), pastels, chalks (i have yet to acquire those, but i've had them in my hand several times)....you get the picture.

i have sought inspiration. (the internet is HUGE, by the way, and totally chock full of inspiration). i have a good idea of what i like (authenticity) and what i don't (sentimentality and bits that are too straight and squarey). i have spent an inordinate amount of time looking at things and not enough time MAKING things.

but now, i have begun. i have an old (but nearly brand new) moleskine journal that i began to use two years ago at a meeting in singapore. i took notes in about 4-5 pages and then abandoned it. not sure why. i have gessoed over the first two pages...it feels cathartic to blot out those notes. they weren't relevant anymore anyway...and then i used some of my new pastels. i mixed a gorgeous blue-green over the gesso, which made an almost canvas-like pattern, thanks to the brush i used with the gesso. my fingers got stained blue-green, from smooshing the pastels around, which i love, because in my synesthetic moments, it's always blue-greens i see. and purples (but i digress..and will elaborate further in another post). i don't know yet what i'll write in it, but what feels good is to cover those old, now meaningless words. to watch the ink blur underneath the gesso and to blot it out with the pastels. very cathartic.